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Don’t wait for the funeral

It's interesting how we speak so well of people at their funeral. You'll hear about all the nice things a person did in their lifetime and about all the things they did so well. I can imagine the person thinking, 'you mean I did that so well and no one told me?'  I came across the term continuous improvement some years back. I thought of it as a watch word; something to keep in mind. Applying it to every part of one's life sets you on a journey to perfection and you find yourself getting better and better. This is one of the reasons I consider feedback as a very important thing. In fact, good...

Don't wait for the funeral

It's interesting how we speak so well of people at their funeral. You'll hear about all the nice things a person did in their lifetime and about all the things they did so well. I can imagine the person thinking, 'you mean I did that so well and no one told me?'  I came across the term continuous improvement some years back. I thought of it as a watch word; something to keep in mind. Applying it to every part of one's life sets you on a journey to perfection and you find yourself getting better and better. This is one of the reasons I consider feedback as a very important thing. In fact, good...

Long Distance – final part

With barely a month to the wedding, Kingsley went house hunting. He would call to ask my opinion as he went about and when he finally found the house he felt would do for our first home, he scheduled a meeting with the agent so I could see it before the rental deal was sealed. The landlord had some renovating to do to make it ready and it was clear we wouldn’t have time to furnish it before the wedding but we were happy and totally at peace about this house. We decided we weren’t going into any debt in the name of having an elaborate wedding ceremony. We worked with our budget and...

Long Distance – Part 3

A lot was happening all at once. 2007 turned out to be quite a year. Could it be because I wrote out all those interesting items on my list of things to accomplish in 2007? Could it be that in addition to dreaming and planning, I was praying for those wonderful things to happen? Could it be that heaven actually paid attention and dispatched resources to grease the wheels of fortune and make those dreams come true? Well there’s more. Sometime before our moves to Lagos, Kingsley came to Abuja to visit his parents. Then he made our engagement official by informing them that ‘Annie’, the young lady they knew very well, was...

Long Distance – Part 2

You couldn’t possibly imagine my joy when we arrived Nigeria. I was unperturbed by the harsh weather in Abuja at that time of year. It was HOT and my then fairer skin was getting it… a warm welcome home indeed. Kingsley was working in Akure, a town about 438km away. A few days into my return, I travelled there to see the place for myself. After all, our first home was going to be there. You see, Kingsley has asked for my hand in marriage before I left for my Masters. On a bus enroute Lagos from Abuja, he took me by the left hand, and said my fingers were beautiful, then he...

Long Distance – The Story

No, I didn’t want to leave my sweetheart… but I had to. It was a painful decision to make. I had experienced a miracle and now it was time for me to do my part. I always wanted a Masters’ degree and after the required exams to study in the US, I was asked to send my result to three schools of my choice. A few weeks, later, I got a message from one school to pay a fee of seventy five dollars for my application to be processed. Believe it or not, $75 was an impossible amount for my family to come up with at that time. If we couldn’t even pay...

LIKE POLES REPEL

People always talk about ‘chemistry’ in love relationships but who would have thought Physics had a role to play in matters of the heart? “Like poles repel and unlike poles attract… so make sure you marry a tall man”. That’s what my physics teacher said to me one day as he provided clues to help me solve a problem. I laughed and left his office but that word was planted like a seed in my mind. I was going to marry a tall man so my kids would be privileged to see the world from a more elevated perspective than mine. I made sure I didn’t give any guy who wasn’t tall...

Wife Finding Skills

'In the multitude of counsellors, there is safety'. It is wise to learn from people who have travelled the road ahead of you. You can incorporate best practices they share into your own life and avoid the pitfalls they bring to your notice. A patron of the Chapel Choir in school shared one of such tips with us during a rehearsal. He was engaged to be married at that time and told us he started praying about his wife several years before. He sounded like the whole process was easier as a result so I decided to do the same. I prayed about everything I could think of – from my future husband’s...