My little one is a professional at saying exactly what he wants and he often insists on getting it. He’ll specify the cup you should use and how full it should be when you prepare him a chocolate drink. He’ll say the outfit he wants to put on for his birthday and will even negotiate his schedule – Mummy, please can I play one game first, then write one to fifty, then go outside and ride my bicycle before I come back and finish my homework?
I grant his requests as often as they are reasonable and have no negative consequence. Right now as I write, he’s asking to keep playing with his bubbles and it’s past his bedtime. He says he won’t cry when we wake him in the morning to get ready for school. This is one of the times when I say NO! There is no end to negotiating with him.
He reminds me of the fact that although so many things are ours for the asking, we may never get them if we never ask. If the terms aren’t favorable for you, you can negotiate for better terms rather than just settle. If the response you get is a NO, you’re no worse off but if you get a YES, that’ll leave you with more satisfaction, more joy and an overall sense of accomplishment. I see that in the big smile that splits his face when he gets the better deal he asked for. That YES can move you many miles ahead on your journey to where you want to be.
Now being only four years old, Micah thinks mostly about himself and what he stands to gain at the time of his request but we have the ability to consider others and to go for a win-win outcome which will make the other parties more open to our proposal.
There really is something here. Know what you want. Be bold enough to ask for it. Think win-win and you will be pleased with the result.
To your success.